![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
phantismaFandom: Supernatural
Title: One for All, All for One
Characters/Pairing: Sam, John, Dean, Sam/Dean,
Rating: R
Summary: This was written for me on the occassion of my birthday by my friend M, it takes place between the Part Five of Where it Hurts and Part One of Dreaming in Stereo. It is part of the Very Dark Wincest Verse. After Kendall Garrett is dead and gone, John and Dean do anything they can to help Sam recover from his ordeal.
I'm hosting it here for readers of the that Verse who wanted to see it.
The Very Dark Wincest Verse includes this ficlet, plus three longer story arcs:
The Good Son, Part One Here
Where it Hurts, Part One Here
Dreaming in Stereo, Part One Here
Warnings for the overall verse include severe violence, rape, torture, incest, and character death.
2 Months Later
Sam reached out to touch his father's mind, softly, gently to announce his presence but still cleared his throat as he approached John.
John turned and smiled. Sam looked good, healthy, calm. There had not been a nightmare in two weeks. Sam had even laughed a few days ago, a full belly laugh. The three of them had been holed up in Kansas for a couple of months. John had wanted to move on but realized that Sam needed some quiet and a lot of rest - getting back onto the road probably wasn't the best idea. To John, it seemed like things are working out. He was learning again how to be a father to his boys; it felt good.
"I need you to agree to something Dad," Sam said. Sam was worried, sure his Dad would say 'No' to this request. But, it is important to him. He needed his Dad to do this for him.
"What do you need Sammy?" John was concerned instantly because he could feel Sam shut down the connection between them and that couldn’t be a good sign.
Sam's eyes avoided John's stare as he stated flatly, "I want the brand gone."
Sam had been kidnapped and imprisoned by Kendall Garrett twice. Garrett was gone now, defeated and destroyed by the Winchesters, sent to hell for all eternity. Sam rested easier knowing that Garrett can not hurt him or either of the two people he loves anymore. But, Sam had been left with physical scars too numerous to count; he had accepted the existence of all of them but one. Garrett had branded his right thigh with a stylized KG, marking him, owning him. Sam despised it and, put simply, needed it to be gone. During one of his nightmares six weeks before, Sam had reached for a knife and was about to cut it out of his flesh before John wrested the knife out of his hand. Sam was unable to talk for twelve hours after that incident, stuck in loop remembering the torture he endured.
Worse, the SamDean connection forged out of necessity during the second kidnapping was left wide open. Sam was so haunted and lost that he did not realize the misery he was sending across the line. Dean lay in the other room in sheer writhing agony. John could only sit and watch as Sam relived the trauma over and over in his mind and sent the pain of the whole thing unfiltered through to Dean. Finally, at a complete loss as to what to do, John had dunked Sam in a tub full of ice water to shock him out of it. Thankfully, it worked and roused Sam out of the trance. When Sam realized what he had done to Dean, he heaved for 10 minutes.
John understood, he really did. He wanted the damn thing gone too. No one owned his son and that damn thing mortified him. "I understand, I do Sammy. But, I won’t let you damage yourself to get rid of it."
"I want you to brand over it." Sam put it out there as bravely as he could muster. Sam slowly opened the connection between them, most of the time he has decent control over it. He needed his father to feel the depth of pain and misery the brand imparted on him. There were no words, just emotion.
Unclean unworthy damaged filthy unclean unclean unclean.
John stared at him dumbfounded at the depth of despair he felt rolling off his son. John nodded his head at Sam - the brand had to go. No one tormented his son that way.
"If I could stand it the first time, I certainly can stand the pain to cover it. I want a giant 'W' on top of it, big and bold." Sam had given this some thought, obviously.
Sam paused and then continued, "But Dad, there is no way I can control my connection to Dean when you do it. You’ll have to knock him out before."
John looked into his son's eyes unsure he heard correctly. There is one thing John knew, "Dean will never agree to being sedated when you are about to have a hot poker sear your skin."
Sam actually laughed at that, "I don't mean sedated. I was thinking more along the lines of a right cross to the jaw right before you start. He will never see it coming."
John could feel the commitment from Sam. It was important to Sam, another part of shutting the door on what happened and moving forward. If his son could endure it, he certainly could do this for him.
"Ok Sam. I'll do it, the branding, the slugging Dean. I have a friend who can make the brand. We'll do it here, in the barn."
Sam's smile lit up his face, "Thanks Dad," and he grabbed his father into a tight hug. John is overwhelmed the by the relief flooding out of Sam as well as the jolt from the physical contact. He wants to be comfortable with his sons and he is trying but it is awkward. He tries harder and gives his best attempt at sending a wave of love back to Sam. It must work in some way since John instantly feels true happiness project off his son. It feels amazing.
:::
"No, absolutely no fucking way Sammy." Dean is shouting, loudly, very loudly.
This is going well thinks Sam.
Sam turns their connection to wide open and lets his feelings for the brand pour into Dean.
I hate it Dean. I'm marked by him. It’is ugly. It’s unclean. He doesn't own me but when I look at it, I see his face and feel his touch. You have to let me do this .I have to be rid of it. Unclean, it makes me unclean.
Dean shudders.
It will hurt like a royal bitch. You have been through too much. You shouldn’t suffer another moment of pain for the rest of your life. It will hurt Sammy, hurt horribly. You are mine, why does the damn thing matter?
Despite Dean's thoughts, Sam feels him giving in.
I can do this. I want to do this. Please let me do this. I need you to understand. And, yes, I am yours & you are mine. Understand, please understand.
Dean gets it but that doesn't help soothe his unease at Sam willingness to take on more torture. Sam leans down to brush Dean's lips with his. The kissing still is relatively new but the comfort it brings seems sacred and safe. As Sam parts Dean's lips with his tongue, Sam feels Dean's assent travel from his tongue into Sam's mouth and emanate throughout his body. Sam feels happy, relieved and very turned on. Dean feels Sam harden against him and thinks Need Want Love.
:::
One Week Later
The brand was made by John's friend, Trevor. It is beautiful in a weird way. A giant 'W', solid, strong, pretty even (in a manly way). It represents the Winchesters perfectly. Dean takes one look at it and announces, "I'm getting one too."
Sam and John look at him like he has lost his mind.
"All for one and one for all," Dean mutters.
When did you become a Dumas fan?
Dean looks at Sam, "Who is Dumas?"
John smiles. Truthfully, getting used to the fact that his sons communicate via some weird SamDean connection half the time is tough. But, he knows it makes them stronger in the end so it pleases him too.
"Ok, I'll brand both of you." John states.
"No, absolutely not. Dean - you are not going to undergo this - No, I say No." Sam's jaw is jutting out, his eyes are flaming and he is yelling. "No. Just No. No No No No"
I'll feel it when you're branded anyway so what difference does it make? Dean looks surprised knowing that Sam must have contemplated this already after the nightmare incident.
Sam doesn't cover his reaction quick enough. No, we have that covered leaks across the connection before he can shut it down.
"What do you mean you have it covered?" Dean is none too pleased.
John stands in the room and wonders if he ever will be able to partake in a full conversation with his sons again. Actually, he is beginning to suspect that soon he won't understand any conversation between them. These half thought, half verbal 'conversations' between his boys are crazy making.
Sam states verbally, "Dean, I asked Dad to knock you out before the branding. Neither of us wants to subject you to the pain secondhand."
"You have no right to make that decision for me," now Dean's eyes are flaring.
John sighs and realizes his two boys need to work this out alone. He leaves the room muttering, "Let me know what you decide."
:::
One Hour Later
It had been ugly. There had been shouting and furniture throwing. John is glad they were unarmed. After 45 minutes, things got strangely quiet. John wondered where the boys had disappeared to.
Next thing John knows, they are standing in front of him, Dean with one arm casually across Sam's back like two kids with a secret. Fight resolved, obviously.
"Ok, let's do it Dad," Dean says.
Frankly, John thought Sam would win this argument. Dean typically caves these days for anything Sam wants. He wonders what Dean did to convince Sam.
:::
Two Hours Later
Dean and Sam are laying on the table in the barn with their respective thighs exposed. The three of them had discussed this and they know what needs to be done. John places bits in their mouths to protect them from biting their tongues. First John ties Dean's hands to a post above his head and then secures his feet to a post at the bottom of the table.
Sam starts hyperventilating when John moves to tie him down. John looks into Sam's eyes and transmits must do this to be safe, keep you from hurting yourself or Dean.
I know I know I know. Just scary. Can't stand being tied down. Scary Scary Scary.
Sam is panicking. Dean jumps in quickly.
It's ok Sammy. I'm here, right next to you. It will be over in 2 minutes and Dad will untie you. Stay with me. Stay with me. Stay with me. Stay with me.
John secures Sam quickly as Dean comforts him across the connection. John plants a kiss on Sam's forehead and then clobbers him across the jaw. John spins quickly and hits Dean a beat later. No way could he do this to his conscious sons. Let them be mad John thinks. He can live with them mad. Sam's idea about the cold cocking was a good one. He can not live with the reaction in their eyes when the brand hits their skin.
John grabs the brand out of the fire. John lowers the brand repeating over and over that Sam needs him to do this. John touches the KG and plants the Giant W over it. The smell of burning flesh makes John choke and gag. Moving fast, he puts the brand back into the fire to reheat it. John quickly checks to make sure that Dean is not coming around. He isn't - John clocked him soundly. John quickly injects some morphine into Sam's arm. No way is he allowing him to suffer more than necessary.
The brand is ready. John lowers it onto Dean's skin in roughly the same spot as Sam's. The smell is awful but John keeps repeating to himself important to Sam, I can do this. Dean gets the same dose of morphine and John doctors both boys' burned skin. He unties them so that Sam doesn't panic when he comes to.
It's done. John sits down on the chair and wipes the sweat off his face and calms his breathing. He just branded his sons. His beautiful, brave sons who were willing to endure branding so one of them can find comfort and a little peace. John smiles. As soon as SamDean are up and around, he is going to have one of them brand him too. Damn, he is a Winchester and wants that W too. Hell, all for one and one for all, right?
Title: One for All, All for One
Characters/Pairing: Sam, John, Dean, Sam/Dean,
Rating: R
Summary: This was written for me on the occassion of my birthday by my friend M, it takes place between the Part Five of Where it Hurts and Part One of Dreaming in Stereo. It is part of the Very Dark Wincest Verse. After Kendall Garrett is dead and gone, John and Dean do anything they can to help Sam recover from his ordeal.
I'm hosting it here for readers of the that Verse who wanted to see it.
The Very Dark Wincest Verse includes this ficlet, plus three longer story arcs:
The Good Son, Part One Here
Where it Hurts, Part One Here
Dreaming in Stereo, Part One Here
Warnings for the overall verse include severe violence, rape, torture, incest, and character death.
2 Months Later
Sam reached out to touch his father's mind, softly, gently to announce his presence but still cleared his throat as he approached John.
John turned and smiled. Sam looked good, healthy, calm. There had not been a nightmare in two weeks. Sam had even laughed a few days ago, a full belly laugh. The three of them had been holed up in Kansas for a couple of months. John had wanted to move on but realized that Sam needed some quiet and a lot of rest - getting back onto the road probably wasn't the best idea. To John, it seemed like things are working out. He was learning again how to be a father to his boys; it felt good.
"I need you to agree to something Dad," Sam said. Sam was worried, sure his Dad would say 'No' to this request. But, it is important to him. He needed his Dad to do this for him.
"What do you need Sammy?" John was concerned instantly because he could feel Sam shut down the connection between them and that couldn’t be a good sign.
Sam's eyes avoided John's stare as he stated flatly, "I want the brand gone."
Sam had been kidnapped and imprisoned by Kendall Garrett twice. Garrett was gone now, defeated and destroyed by the Winchesters, sent to hell for all eternity. Sam rested easier knowing that Garrett can not hurt him or either of the two people he loves anymore. But, Sam had been left with physical scars too numerous to count; he had accepted the existence of all of them but one. Garrett had branded his right thigh with a stylized KG, marking him, owning him. Sam despised it and, put simply, needed it to be gone. During one of his nightmares six weeks before, Sam had reached for a knife and was about to cut it out of his flesh before John wrested the knife out of his hand. Sam was unable to talk for twelve hours after that incident, stuck in loop remembering the torture he endured.
Worse, the SamDean connection forged out of necessity during the second kidnapping was left wide open. Sam was so haunted and lost that he did not realize the misery he was sending across the line. Dean lay in the other room in sheer writhing agony. John could only sit and watch as Sam relived the trauma over and over in his mind and sent the pain of the whole thing unfiltered through to Dean. Finally, at a complete loss as to what to do, John had dunked Sam in a tub full of ice water to shock him out of it. Thankfully, it worked and roused Sam out of the trance. When Sam realized what he had done to Dean, he heaved for 10 minutes.
John understood, he really did. He wanted the damn thing gone too. No one owned his son and that damn thing mortified him. "I understand, I do Sammy. But, I won’t let you damage yourself to get rid of it."
"I want you to brand over it." Sam put it out there as bravely as he could muster. Sam slowly opened the connection between them, most of the time he has decent control over it. He needed his father to feel the depth of pain and misery the brand imparted on him. There were no words, just emotion.
Unclean unworthy damaged filthy unclean unclean unclean.
John stared at him dumbfounded at the depth of despair he felt rolling off his son. John nodded his head at Sam - the brand had to go. No one tormented his son that way.
"If I could stand it the first time, I certainly can stand the pain to cover it. I want a giant 'W' on top of it, big and bold." Sam had given this some thought, obviously.
Sam paused and then continued, "But Dad, there is no way I can control my connection to Dean when you do it. You’ll have to knock him out before."
John looked into his son's eyes unsure he heard correctly. There is one thing John knew, "Dean will never agree to being sedated when you are about to have a hot poker sear your skin."
Sam actually laughed at that, "I don't mean sedated. I was thinking more along the lines of a right cross to the jaw right before you start. He will never see it coming."
John could feel the commitment from Sam. It was important to Sam, another part of shutting the door on what happened and moving forward. If his son could endure it, he certainly could do this for him.
"Ok Sam. I'll do it, the branding, the slugging Dean. I have a friend who can make the brand. We'll do it here, in the barn."
Sam's smile lit up his face, "Thanks Dad," and he grabbed his father into a tight hug. John is overwhelmed the by the relief flooding out of Sam as well as the jolt from the physical contact. He wants to be comfortable with his sons and he is trying but it is awkward. He tries harder and gives his best attempt at sending a wave of love back to Sam. It must work in some way since John instantly feels true happiness project off his son. It feels amazing.
:::
"No, absolutely no fucking way Sammy." Dean is shouting, loudly, very loudly.
This is going well thinks Sam.
Sam turns their connection to wide open and lets his feelings for the brand pour into Dean.
I hate it Dean. I'm marked by him. It’is ugly. It’s unclean. He doesn't own me but when I look at it, I see his face and feel his touch. You have to let me do this .I have to be rid of it. Unclean, it makes me unclean.
Dean shudders.
It will hurt like a royal bitch. You have been through too much. You shouldn’t suffer another moment of pain for the rest of your life. It will hurt Sammy, hurt horribly. You are mine, why does the damn thing matter?
Despite Dean's thoughts, Sam feels him giving in.
I can do this. I want to do this. Please let me do this. I need you to understand. And, yes, I am yours & you are mine. Understand, please understand.
Dean gets it but that doesn't help soothe his unease at Sam willingness to take on more torture. Sam leans down to brush Dean's lips with his. The kissing still is relatively new but the comfort it brings seems sacred and safe. As Sam parts Dean's lips with his tongue, Sam feels Dean's assent travel from his tongue into Sam's mouth and emanate throughout his body. Sam feels happy, relieved and very turned on. Dean feels Sam harden against him and thinks Need Want Love.
:::
One Week Later
The brand was made by John's friend, Trevor. It is beautiful in a weird way. A giant 'W', solid, strong, pretty even (in a manly way). It represents the Winchesters perfectly. Dean takes one look at it and announces, "I'm getting one too."
Sam and John look at him like he has lost his mind.
"All for one and one for all," Dean mutters.
When did you become a Dumas fan?
Dean looks at Sam, "Who is Dumas?"
John smiles. Truthfully, getting used to the fact that his sons communicate via some weird SamDean connection half the time is tough. But, he knows it makes them stronger in the end so it pleases him too.
"Ok, I'll brand both of you." John states.
"No, absolutely not. Dean - you are not going to undergo this - No, I say No." Sam's jaw is jutting out, his eyes are flaming and he is yelling. "No. Just No. No No No No"
I'll feel it when you're branded anyway so what difference does it make? Dean looks surprised knowing that Sam must have contemplated this already after the nightmare incident.
Sam doesn't cover his reaction quick enough. No, we have that covered leaks across the connection before he can shut it down.
"What do you mean you have it covered?" Dean is none too pleased.
John stands in the room and wonders if he ever will be able to partake in a full conversation with his sons again. Actually, he is beginning to suspect that soon he won't understand any conversation between them. These half thought, half verbal 'conversations' between his boys are crazy making.
Sam states verbally, "Dean, I asked Dad to knock you out before the branding. Neither of us wants to subject you to the pain secondhand."
"You have no right to make that decision for me," now Dean's eyes are flaring.
John sighs and realizes his two boys need to work this out alone. He leaves the room muttering, "Let me know what you decide."
:::
One Hour Later
It had been ugly. There had been shouting and furniture throwing. John is glad they were unarmed. After 45 minutes, things got strangely quiet. John wondered where the boys had disappeared to.
Next thing John knows, they are standing in front of him, Dean with one arm casually across Sam's back like two kids with a secret. Fight resolved, obviously.
"Ok, let's do it Dad," Dean says.
Frankly, John thought Sam would win this argument. Dean typically caves these days for anything Sam wants. He wonders what Dean did to convince Sam.
:::
Two Hours Later
Dean and Sam are laying on the table in the barn with their respective thighs exposed. The three of them had discussed this and they know what needs to be done. John places bits in their mouths to protect them from biting their tongues. First John ties Dean's hands to a post above his head and then secures his feet to a post at the bottom of the table.
Sam starts hyperventilating when John moves to tie him down. John looks into Sam's eyes and transmits must do this to be safe, keep you from hurting yourself or Dean.
I know I know I know. Just scary. Can't stand being tied down. Scary Scary Scary.
Sam is panicking. Dean jumps in quickly.
It's ok Sammy. I'm here, right next to you. It will be over in 2 minutes and Dad will untie you. Stay with me. Stay with me. Stay with me. Stay with me.
John secures Sam quickly as Dean comforts him across the connection. John plants a kiss on Sam's forehead and then clobbers him across the jaw. John spins quickly and hits Dean a beat later. No way could he do this to his conscious sons. Let them be mad John thinks. He can live with them mad. Sam's idea about the cold cocking was a good one. He can not live with the reaction in their eyes when the brand hits their skin.
John grabs the brand out of the fire. John lowers the brand repeating over and over that Sam needs him to do this. John touches the KG and plants the Giant W over it. The smell of burning flesh makes John choke and gag. Moving fast, he puts the brand back into the fire to reheat it. John quickly checks to make sure that Dean is not coming around. He isn't - John clocked him soundly. John quickly injects some morphine into Sam's arm. No way is he allowing him to suffer more than necessary.
The brand is ready. John lowers it onto Dean's skin in roughly the same spot as Sam's. The smell is awful but John keeps repeating to himself important to Sam, I can do this. Dean gets the same dose of morphine and John doctors both boys' burned skin. He unties them so that Sam doesn't panic when he comes to.
It's done. John sits down on the chair and wipes the sweat off his face and calms his breathing. He just branded his sons. His beautiful, brave sons who were willing to endure branding so one of them can find comfort and a little peace. John smiles. As soon as SamDean are up and around, he is going to have one of them brand him too. Damn, he is a Winchester and wants that W too. Hell, all for one and one for all, right?
