![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
phantismaTitle: All You Ever Learned of Love (Part Four- Index is Here)
Author name:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
phantisma
Artist name:raggedy_edge
Genre: SPN Wincest
Pairing: Sam/Dean, Sam/Jess, Sam/OC, Dean/OC
Rating: NC-17
Word count: ~24, 848
Warnings/Spoilers: Brainwashing, het sex, group sex, dub-con, blood kink
Summary: First Sam disappeared, and no matter how hard they looked, John and Dean couldn't find him. Then Dean went missing. John Winchester searches for them, enlisting the help of friends at first to find them, and then once he has to save them from the cult that has brainwashed them with sex and magic. But this is no ordinary cult, and their leader is the demon John's been hunting since his wife died. He isn't about to let his favorite followers go without a fight.
A/Ns: This is my entry into this year's Big Bang for SPN. It is the sequel to last years. You don't have to read that one to follow this one, but if you're interested, the master post is here. Many thank yous to my betaeboniorchid. Also, a big thank you to my artist, raggedy_edge, who is awesome.
Master Art Post: http://raggedy-edge.livejournal.com/87154.html
The air was sticky hot, clinging to him as Daniel touched him, petting through the sweat and down to Sam's thick, hard cock. "Beautiful, Sam." Daniel murmured as his body pressed to Sam's back, his cock dragging through his crack and up to his hole. "Just like that."
Sam groaned with the effort to keep still while Daniel filled him, wanting to push back, to hurry this, to push him, but this was not to be hurried. This was sacred and powerful. His senses were all blown open, the input almost too much.
He reached back, over his head, leaning back at the same time, his mouth questing for Daniel's. He was rewarded with a bruising kiss, teeth and tongue and Daniel's hand dragging down his cock with a tight grip.
Sam groaned again, head dropping forward. Sweat dripped from his nose and ran down his arms as they braced against the floor, holding him up. Daniel murmured in some forgotten language, one finger drawing runes into the sweat slicked skin of Sam's back. "Think of your father." Daniel whispered, conjuring images in Sam's mind. Sam held one, the memory of seeing him at the door the day he'd shown up unexpectedly, focused on everything about him; the gray in his beard, the smell of beer and dirt and motel soap, the taste of his anger, the power of his presence. "Yes. Right like that."
Daniel thrust up into him again, his fingers moving in an intricate pattern as he murmured the power words. Desire swelled inside him, craving. Sam breathed through it, moaning as Daniel fucked up into him harder. "Take what I give you Samuel. Use it to bring him peace."
Sam felt the movement, smelled the blood, and opened his eyes, watching as Daniel brought his arm close to Sam's mouth. Blood welled in a line down his arm, calling Sam. He surged toward it, both hands lifting to cradle Daniel's arm and pull it to his mouth.
He licked up the blood that was dripping, licked up over the wound before his mouth closed over it and his eyes rolled closed. The copper tang and salty burn gave way to fire, and Sam swallowed, his cock swelling as power flowed into him from Daniel.
Under them he could feel the writhing masses of Daniel's followers as they fucked in a hundred variations, the energy amassing and funneling into Daniel, then into Sam. He knew their names, their lives, everything about them, could taste their spark.
Daniel's cock filled him, his come as hot and potent as his blood. Sam lifted his face, licking at the blood still on his lips, dripping off his chin. He panted through Daniel's thrusting, head falling back on Daniel's shoulder as Daniel bit into his neck muscle and squeezed Sam's cock.
Sam's orgasm rippled through him, filling Daniel's hand. When it had stopped, Daniel lifted his hand, feeding the come into Sam's mouth and wiping up the blood to feed Sam as well. Sam licked his palm, sucked at his fingers until they were clean.
Daniel's cock inside him was still hard. He kissed his way up to Sam's sweaty hair. "You belong to me, Sam." Daniel whispered. "Bring him to me."
Sam nodded. "I will Daniel." He turned, Daniel's cock slipping out of him, and kissed Daniel deeply. Power thrummed through him. He could see Daniel, not the human form he wore, but the demon underneath. He was radiant.
"I love you Sam."
"And I love you, Daniel."
"Go get cleaned up. Call your brother. He should be nearly ready."
They were nearly through their meal when John saw the first signs of the drug affecting Dean. His words slurred a little and he shook his head like he was dizzy.
"You okay, Son?"
Dean frowned. "I don't know. Feels weird."
John forced a laugh. "Don't tell me you're drunk. You haven't even finished your second beer."
"No…just…fuzzy." Dean blinked and looked up at him. "What was I saying?"
"Something about how you think I'd really like it here?" John said, finishing off his second beer.
"Yeah, there's a lot you'd like." Dean said, squinting at him. "You could stay with Sam."
It was John's turn to blink, an odd desire building inside him to agree with Dean. Maybe it was time to move things along. "You know, you don't look so good."
Dean was starting to sweat and he tugged at his collar. "Yeah…not feeling great either."
"Why don't you let me drive you back?"
Dean nodded and John pulled out his wallet, dropping enough money to cover the bill and sliding out of the booth. Dean followed, grabbing at his arm as they neared the door. "Woah."
John slipped an arm around him to hold him up and took him to the truck, helping him inside. He checked the street as he got in, turning the engine before he was fully in the seat. "Just hold on Dean, it's going to be okay."
"What…" Dean was shaking his head, holding the dashboard. "Did you d'ug me?" His words slurred and he was starting to look a little green.
"It's for your own good, Dean." John pulled onto the freeway and headed for the Bay Bridge. He had to get Dean out to Oakland before he figured out how to get Sam too. Dean's head lolled against the seat, his eyes closing as the drug dragged him under.
John found the deserted looking warehouse building easily enough, and Joshua opened the overhead door to let him pull in next to the ambulance that they would use to get the hell out of California once he had both boys.. "He's out."
Joshua nodded as he opened Dean's door. "Good, that should make him easier to lock down."
"Don't bet on it." John pulled his gun out from under the truck and came around to help Joshua with Dean. "We need to get him settled before I call Sam."
"You sure you want to do this? Both of them at once?"
"What choice do I have?" John asked. They got Dean into an empty room that they had already boarded up and onto one of the gurneys. Joshua was putting the medical restraints on Dean's hand when Dean's pocket started ringing. John fished out the phone. "It's Sam. If Dean doesn't answer…"
"He'll call back. Focus." Joshua said.
John nodded and worked at getting Dean's boots off. "You going to tell me how it is you just know where to find an ambulance no one's using?"
Joshua just grinned and threw him the restraints for Dean's ankles. John put Dean's phone in his pocket and strapped Dean down. "He should be down for a few hours."
"Long enough for us to handle Sam and hit the road." Joshua agreed. "We can get an IV into both of them before we hit the road, keep them under." He double checked the restraints and turned to John. "Bobby called. He said you're an idjit and he's about an hour out."
"You hear from Caleb?"
Joshua nodded. "He's setting up. Should be ready when we get there."
The phone rang again, buzzing against his thigh. He nodded to Joshua and pulled the phone out, exhaling before he opened it.
"Dean?"
"Sam." John stepped out of the room.
"Dad. Where are you? Is Dean with you?"
"Yes, Sam. I have Dean with me. He wasn't feeling well."
"Tell me where you are."
John was supposed to give him the address they'd picked, a motel a little ways away. That was where they were going to get the drop on him. Instead, he opened his mouth and gave Sam the address of the warehouse.
"I'm on my way."
Sam hung up and John cursed, throwing the phone.
"What was that?" Joshua asked.
"I don't know. I couldn't stop myself."
"Are you sure Dean's the only one that got drugged tonight?"
John shook his head. "It was Sam. Something in his voice." Fucking magic. He was going to find the man who did this to them and tear him limb from limb.
Power flowed through him at a frightening level. It had never been this strong before. His blood pulsed with it. He had hardly had to push to get his father to tell him where he'd taken Dean. Of course, Dean had warmed him up. Dean had spent their time alone together gently nudging, and the light drugs Ethan had laced his beer with had helped, but still…he felt like he could take on anyone.
All he had to do was manipulate his father into orgasm, and Sam would have him. He was across the bridge and flying down 880 when a niggling thought that something was wrong started to bug him.
He couldn't place it though and he pushed it aside. This was something his father needed. He'd spent so many years so pent up after the death of their mother. He deserved to be free, just as much as Dean did.
It wouldn't be easy. His father was suspicious by nature, way more than Dean. That was why Daniel had juiced him up this much. He would hold on to the things he thought he knew, the things he believed were right or wrong.
Sam just had to get through to him though. Had to make him see how much better it could be, how beautiful it was to let go.
His father wasn't alone. He knew that before he turned off the engine. He could sense Dean, unconscious…and someone else, someone he didn't know as well. Vaguely familiar. He climbed out of the car outside the warehouse and approached cautiously.
His father opened the door. "Hey, Sam."
"Dad, where's Dean?"
"He's laying down. Inside." John said, watching Sam carefully. Sam reached out for him, but instead of finding his father an open mess of old wounds and sexual needs, he found only a small bit of confusion.
"What did you do to him?" Dean hadn't held up his end. Something had to have distracted him.
"I didn't do anything to him. We had dinner. He wasn't feeling well."
"So you brought him here?" Sam took a step closer and John backed up a step. "Did you drug him? Really?" He shook his head. "You know we only want to help you, Dad. We want you to know what it feels like to be free."
"I do." John said calmly.
Sam felt someone approaching and turned, just in time to take a two by four to the side of his head, knocking him to the ground.
"Shit, Bobby." John said, racing forward.
"He'll be fine." Bobby's voice sounded strange. Sam blinked up as his father knelt beside him. "I'll get the gurney."
Sam felt warm wetness on his neck and his hand fluttered to it, coming away bloody. He tried to get up, tried to move, but his father was shushing him and telling him everything was going to be okay now. He tried, he pushed at his father's head, but all he got was static, and the sensation of something cold pushing into him, pushing against the fire in his blood and lulling him to sleep.
The drive out of California seemed to take forever. John and Joshua rode in the ambulance, dressed like EMTs. Bobby followed in the Impala. Joshua would come back for the truck once they were settled. There were a few tense minutes as they reached the border, but Joshua's paperwork got them waved through and once in Nevada, they just had to drive.
Bobby had researched what he could, called in some markers from experts who knew this kind of situation, cults that increase their hold through magic and sex. Caleb had an isolated spot in the middle of nowhere for the deprogramming, a place long held sacred, first to Native people, then owned by an old hunter who had further fortified it against demonic activity. He had laid in food and supplies and was just putting up the finishing touches on a serious set of wards when Joshua turned them onto the property.
John was in the back, making sure the boys stayed down, under deep sedation. He wasn't even sure how they were going to go about this, only that he had to get them away from the bastard that had bewitched them if he was going to get them back.
The door opened and Joshua and Caleb were there to help him get Sam down, then Dean. Sam was already starting to come around as they wheeled the gurney into the building.
"Dad?" Sam pulled at the restraints, his head turning. "Where are we?"
"Someplace safe." John responded. He and Caleb guided Sam's gurney into the room Caleb had prepared. The old barn was well suited for the task, the storage room complete with a concrete floor he couldn't dig his way out of, no windows. Just the cot and nothing else.
"What are you doing?" Sam asked as Caleb started undoing the restraints.
"You may not believe it now, Sam. But we're helping you." John said, working on the restraints holding Sam's hands. He and Caleb helped Sam off the gurney and onto the cot, then Caleb withdrew with the gurney.
"You drugged me?"
John nodded. "It was for your own good Sam. I know you can't see it, but that place was poisoning your mind. I had to get you away."
Sam shook his head. "No, Dad…you don't understand. Daniel…he's going to be upset. I have to go back."
"No, Son. You don't."
Sam grabbed at his arm. "Where's Dean?"
"He's here too. He's safe. I'm going to take care of both of you."
Sam narrowed his eyes, concentrating. "You have to let us go."
John pulled back, shaking his head. It felt almost like the idea was his own, even though he knew better. "No, Sam."
He moved to the door. "I'm going to give you some time for the drugs to wear off. We'll talk again soon." He closed the door and locked the deadbolt, then lowered the locking bar.
"You okay?" Caleb asked, handing him a mug of coffee.
"Okay?" John asked, sipping the coffee. "No. I am not okay."
"Dean's settled in." Bobby said as he joined them. "Joshua's headed back to return the ambulance."
John nodded and crossed to the table in the makeshift kitchen Caleb had set up in one corner of the barn. They had the boys separated, on opposite ends of the barn. "So, tell me what we know."
Bobby set down a file folder and went to pour himself some coffee. "The Temple of Liberation is a legitimate non-profit, at least as far as Uncle Sam's concerned. They lay low, fly under the radar."
"What about this whacko you told me about?" John asked, dragging the file closer.
"Adam Levy. He's in there. I talked to him on my way to meet you."
"And?" John looked up from the picture of a wiry young man with frizzy hair and glasses.
"Well, he's not as whacko as some might think. What he described sounds an awful lot like a ritual used in ancient Syria, with a few modern twists."
"And this ritual does what exactly?" Caleb asked.
"Well, it was in worship of a demon who bestowed great power on his disciples." Bobby responded, pulling a book out of his bag. "It was said that they could command whole villages in an orgy of sex and sacrifice that reportedly fed power back to the demon."
"Great." John rubbed a hand over his face. "So, what do we do next?"
"We have to break the brainwashing that got them into this in the first place." Bobby said. "He had to have used some trick to pull them in. Your boys ain't that stupid." He drank from his coffee and shook his head. "Okay, Sam ain't that stupid that a pretty face was enough to pull him into this sort of shit."
John bit his lip. "No. Sam's reasons are a lot darker than just that pretty girl. And Dean's too for that matter." He didn't want his friends to know what he knew, but he was going to need their help.
"John, if you can't tell us, we can't help you." Caleb said softly.
"I know." He exhaled. "I don't know the details, but for Dean it stems back to something that happened when he was fourteen. Some coach at one of the schools…hurt him." He couldn't look up. "He never told anyone. Just buried it until something happened between him and Sam."
"Are you saying…" Bobby's voice trailed off and John nodded.
"Yeah, Bobby, I am. Some fucking bastard raped my son and he just kept quiet about it."
They were all quiet for a moment before Caleb asked the next obvious question. "And what happened with him and Sam?"
John sighed heavily and dragged his hand through his hair. "Remember old Joe Mendon's death?" Caleb and Bobby both nodded. "We were the only ones close enough to go in and get that hex box out before his family showed up. Apparently Dean picked up some damn idol and passed it to Sam, and they ended up…I don't know, cursed."
"One of those damn African mating idols he was always peddling around?" Bobby asked frowning. "I thought they were all gimmicks."
"Apparently not all." John growled. "They apparently…" He made hand gestures to indicate what they'd done and stood, pushing his chair back. "A few months later, Sam disappeared."
"Okay, I can see how that might put Sam in a vulnerable state of mind." Caleb said. "It gives us a place to start at least." He picked up his phone. "I've got some deprogramming experts waiting to for me to call and give them some basics. They'll let us know how to proceed."
John watched him go, wanting to throw punches or burn something. He'd never been good at sitting around.
"Why don't you go get some sleep?" Bobby offered. "Caleb set up bedrooms in the house. I'll stay with the boys. We can't do anything until they're clean of the drugs anyway."
John nodded, though he didn't think he'd sleep, at least he needed a break. A few minutes to not think of all the ways he'd failed his boys.
Sam paced the room. Three steps over cold concrete floors from the cot to the wall. Three more from the locked door to the back wall. He shook his head. This was not supposed to happen. He didn't see it, he didn't understand it.
He frowned. Daniel was going to be angry. Daniel was going to come looking for them. And when Daniel found them, Sam wasn't sure what he would do.
He had been fully awake for hours now, the lead feeling in his legs gone, the buzz in his head vanished.
There was movement outside the door. Sam could feel them…three of them. Bobby, Caleb and John. He reached for his father, but felt resistance. He frowned harder. His father shouldn't resist. Sam only wanted to help him.
The door opened, but instead of John Winchester, Bobby stood there, a tray of food in his hands. The door closed behind him and Bobby nodded tightly.
"Sam."
"Bobby? Where's my father?"
"He won't be coming in to see you just yet. He sent me with some dinner and his promise that you aren't alone."
"This is insane. Let me talk to him."
Bobby looked at him hard and moved to put the tray on the bed. "You and I both know that ain't gonna happen, Son. Best you just deal with it and eat."
Sam tried to feel him out, but Bobby was a solid wall with nothing to grab onto mentally. "What about Dean? Can I see Dean?"
"Maybe when you're both a little more yourselves, okay?"
"What is that supposed to mean?" Sam snorted as Bobby reached for the door.
Bobby crossed his arms and looked up at Sam. "Do I really need to spell it out for you? You're smarter than that, Sam."
"So this is what…an intervention? Are you going to prove something like this?"
"We're just trying to help Sam."
Bobby left him then, the door closing quickly behind him. Sam crossed to it and tested the knob, not surprised to find it locked again. He pounded on it for a minute, yelling for his father, for Dean.
When his hand hurt, he turned away, leaning into the door. Obviously they thought that by isolating them, they would be able to reason with them…get to them. Turn them against Daniel.
Sam shook his head and went back to pacing. He wouldn't betray Daniel, not after everything Daniel had given him. Daniel loved him and Sam loved Daniel.
Daniel had made everything okay. His love for his brother, his need and desire for Dean, without Daniel, Sam was lost. He would never leave willingly. He had to get back to him. Somehow.
Dean looked up blearily from the corner of the room as the door opened. Caleb stepped into the room, a tray in his hands. Dean squinted at him, not entirely sure he was real.
"Dean?"
Everything was too much, the light, the sound of the door scraping the floor, the way Caleb's voice rose. Dean lowered his head into his knees, covering his head with his hands.
Footsteps echoed on the cold floor and a hand touched his head. "Dean, are you okay?"
Dean lifted his head, blinking up at Caleb. "Where…?"
"Someplace safe." Caleb said, squatting beside him.
"Sam?"
Caleb nodded. "He's here too."
Dean held his head. "I don't feel so good."
"No, I'm betting you don't. Your father had to put you down pretty hard. It's going to take a while to work its way out of you." Caleb pointed at the cot and the tray of food he'd set there. "You should eat."
"I want Sam."
"Sam has his own problems, Dean. We need to get you both better before we let you two see each other." He stood and crossed back to the door. "I'm going to be right out here if you need anything."
Dean watched him go and slowly unfolded himself from the corner. His father. Dean remembered being at dinner with his father, remembered the beer. He'd been supposed to be doing something…but it was all fuzzy. He picked himself up off the floor and went to the door. He didn't understand why it was locked.
He knew this wasn't right. He shouldn't be here…but he wasn't sure where he was supposed to be. He went to the bed and sat on it, lifting the sandwich, sniffing it.
Daniel.
Dean remembered Daniel.
Daniel loved him. Daniel helped him. Daniel gave him Sam. Made everything okay with Sam.
He held on to that.
"No. No. You let me out. You let me out right now." Sam growled from behind the door.
John pressed his back into the door to keep it closed, but he was losing the fight. Sam was insanely strong. Inhumanly strong. Joshua and Caleb held the high powered hose and nodded at him.
John dove out of the way and the door burst open, Sam charging throughw it, just as Caleb turned on the water. Sam fought against the heavy spray, but the water made the floor slick and pushed him back until he was flailing and falling against the wall. John and Bobby ducked around the other two and the hose, moving in while Sam was still struggling.
The wrestled him down, binding his feet and hands so he wouldn't hurt himself, or them.
"Settle down." John said, his voice gruff with tired and worry.
"Or what, you'll shoot me full of your drugs? You think that will keep me away from him? Daniel loves me. Daniel wants me."
"Daniel is using you." John said. "He's a demon Sam."
"I don't care! Let me go." Sam struggled against the restraints. It was time to start weakening him, tearing him down. Making him face what he'd become. They'd already made sure he wasn't possessed, but hadn't ruled out an exorcism as a symbolic way to further pull him away from Daniel's influence.
John held him down while Bobby got Sam's shoes off of him. When his feet were bare, John stood, nodding to Bobby. "I love you, Son."
"You don't love me. You never loved me." Sam spit at him, thrashing around again. "If you loved me you would let me go."
"I can't do that Sam."
John got to the door and turned back. Sam had gone still and was looking up at him. "He'll come for me." Sam said quietly.
"No, Sam. He won't." John shut the door and locked it, leaning his forehead against it.
"That isn't really him." Bobby said softly.
John nodded. "I know."
"He doesn't mean it."
John sighed and turned his back to the door. "I know Bobby." He took the coffee cup Joshua offered with a nod. It had only been twenty-four hours. It was going to get worse before it got better. Sam had gone from trying to talk his way out, to demanding, to throwing himself at the door and they had decided to restrain him to keep him from hurting himself.
"Sam was in for three years, John. That's a long time under that kind of power." Joshua said. "This will take time."
John nodded and sipped at the coffee. "Patience is not one of my better virtues." He set the cup aside and headed for Dean's door. "I'm going to check on Dean."
He listened at Dean's door for a few minutes before opening it. Dean sat on the cot, staring at the floor. He flinched when the door opened, but didn't move. John pulled the door shut and crossed his arms, leaning on the wall. "How you feeling?"
"My head hurts." Dean mumbled, still not looking up.
"I can get you some aspirin."
"Why?" Dean asked after a long silence.
John frowned. "Why, what?"
"Why did you do this?" Dean lifted his head and it was clear he'd been crying. His eyes were rimmed in red. "We were happy."
John shook his head. "I know that you think you were happy, Dean. But in a few days, when your head clears, you're going to know the truth."
"We only wanted you to be happy too. That's why we let you find us." He stood, taking a tentative step toward his father. "We could be so happy together, Dad. If you'd let us show you."
John put out a hand, stopping Dean as he came into reach. "Do you hear what you're saying, Dean? Is that really what you want? The three of us lost inside some demon's sex cult, deluded into thinking we're happy?"
"I'm not deluded. I was happy when Daniel taught me how to love. How to express love."
"What he teaches isn't love." John countered. "It's sex. Nothing more."
"Sex is a physical manifestation of love. It's natural. Beautiful." Dean turned and walked back to the cot. "I could show you."
John swallowed the vague desire to let him, knowing it was a remnant of whatever they'd slipped him and whatever power the demon had given Dean. "No. I'm your father."
Dean shrugged. "Father, brother, sister, mother….they're just words. They don't matter. Love matters, and the expression of that love matters."
"Wow." John shook his head. "You know, you are the last person I expected to ever hear this kind of bullshit out of. Your brother always was a little soft emotionally, took everything so damn personal. But you?"
"Maybe you don't know me as well as you think." Dean spit at him. "Maybe I'm not the good little soldier you always wanted. Maybe inside I'm still a broken little boy that you never bothered to see. Maybe that's why you won't let me help you. You don't want to admit that you were wrong."
"Oh, I was wrong?" John pushed off the wall. "I'm not the one who picked up some damn idol and cursed himself. I'm not the one who got seduced by a goddamn demon."
Dean turned, his face filled with fury. "No, you're the one who left a fourteen year old boy alone and let him get raped, and then never even noticed that I was different. You're the one who left me to raise Sam while you ran off chasing your demons. You're the one who let Mom die in the first place."
The words slammed into him and John took a step back. Just like Sam, this wasn't really Dean, it was a defense, to keep him from having to come out of the programming. John swallowed and turned to the door. "I'll get you that aspirin. You want anything else?"
"I want to go home."
"You are home." John responded.
"I want to see Sam."
"No. Not yet."
"Keep your damn aspirin." Dean turned away and John let himself out, closing the door and locking it.
"Well, that went well." John mused darkly as he rejoined the others.
"Why don't you let us keep an eye on them for now." Bobby offered. "Caleb is back from his run into town. He said something about getting the grill started."
John nodded. "Yeah, I could use some food."
He headed out of the barn and up to the house. He could already smell the charcoal burning. Caleb pulled a beer out of a cooler as he approached, cracking it open before handing it across. "Picked up some steaks while I was out. Figured a good meal would do us all some good."
John took a long drag off the beer and turned to look at the barn. "I'll be surprised if either of the boys eat for a while. They've both hit the angry stage."
"Are you going to be okay with what we have to do, John?" Caleb asked as he laid meat on the grill. "I mean, this will get ugly before it gets any better."
"I know." He looked down at his hand wrapped around the beer. "Honestly, I'm not sure. Dean…he has a point." He had left Dean alone to raise Sam a lot. Even when he'd been there, he'd expected a hell of a lot of the kid. And he hadn't even suspected the rape. He'd suspected something had happened, but nothing like that. "What kind of father was I?"
He looked away, not expecting Caleb to answer.
"No one is saying you win any prizes, John." Caleb said after a few moments of silence. "But as fathers go, you were better than some. Mine for example."
John turned to look at him, but Caleb shrugged it off. He'd never spoken much about his childhood, and all John knew was that he had lived on the streets for a while before a hunter took him in.
"My dad would make this Daniel guy look like a saint, is all I'm saying." He poked at the steaks on the grill, then looked up, wise ass smile in place. "And I turned out just fine. Slightly twisted, but fine."
"I wish I could say the same for my boys." John drank from the beer.
"We will get them through this." Caleb assured him.
"And then what?" John asked, shaking his head. "This is only the beginning."
"One step at a time, my friend. One step at a time."
Author name:
phantismaArtist name:
raggedy_edgeGenre: SPN Wincest
Pairing: Sam/Dean, Sam/Jess, Sam/OC, Dean/OC
Rating: NC-17
Word count: ~24, 848
Warnings/Spoilers: Brainwashing, het sex, group sex, dub-con, blood kink
Summary: First Sam disappeared, and no matter how hard they looked, John and Dean couldn't find him. Then Dean went missing. John Winchester searches for them, enlisting the help of friends at first to find them, and then once he has to save them from the cult that has brainwashed them with sex and magic. But this is no ordinary cult, and their leader is the demon John's been hunting since his wife died. He isn't about to let his favorite followers go without a fight.
A/Ns: This is my entry into this year's Big Bang for SPN. It is the sequel to last years. You don't have to read that one to follow this one, but if you're interested, the master post is here. Many thank yous to my beta
eboniorchid. Also, a big thank you to my artist, raggedy_edge, who is awesome.Master Art Post: http://raggedy-edge.livejournal.com/87154.html
The air was sticky hot, clinging to him as Daniel touched him, petting through the sweat and down to Sam's thick, hard cock. "Beautiful, Sam." Daniel murmured as his body pressed to Sam's back, his cock dragging through his crack and up to his hole. "Just like that."
Sam groaned with the effort to keep still while Daniel filled him, wanting to push back, to hurry this, to push him, but this was not to be hurried. This was sacred and powerful. His senses were all blown open, the input almost too much.
He reached back, over his head, leaning back at the same time, his mouth questing for Daniel's. He was rewarded with a bruising kiss, teeth and tongue and Daniel's hand dragging down his cock with a tight grip.
Sam groaned again, head dropping forward. Sweat dripped from his nose and ran down his arms as they braced against the floor, holding him up. Daniel murmured in some forgotten language, one finger drawing runes into the sweat slicked skin of Sam's back. "Think of your father." Daniel whispered, conjuring images in Sam's mind. Sam held one, the memory of seeing him at the door the day he'd shown up unexpectedly, focused on everything about him; the gray in his beard, the smell of beer and dirt and motel soap, the taste of his anger, the power of his presence. "Yes. Right like that."
Daniel thrust up into him again, his fingers moving in an intricate pattern as he murmured the power words. Desire swelled inside him, craving. Sam breathed through it, moaning as Daniel fucked up into him harder. "Take what I give you Samuel. Use it to bring him peace."
Sam felt the movement, smelled the blood, and opened his eyes, watching as Daniel brought his arm close to Sam's mouth. Blood welled in a line down his arm, calling Sam. He surged toward it, both hands lifting to cradle Daniel's arm and pull it to his mouth.
He licked up the blood that was dripping, licked up over the wound before his mouth closed over it and his eyes rolled closed. The copper tang and salty burn gave way to fire, and Sam swallowed, his cock swelling as power flowed into him from Daniel.
Under them he could feel the writhing masses of Daniel's followers as they fucked in a hundred variations, the energy amassing and funneling into Daniel, then into Sam. He knew their names, their lives, everything about them, could taste their spark.
Daniel's cock filled him, his come as hot and potent as his blood. Sam lifted his face, licking at the blood still on his lips, dripping off his chin. He panted through Daniel's thrusting, head falling back on Daniel's shoulder as Daniel bit into his neck muscle and squeezed Sam's cock.
Sam's orgasm rippled through him, filling Daniel's hand. When it had stopped, Daniel lifted his hand, feeding the come into Sam's mouth and wiping up the blood to feed Sam as well. Sam licked his palm, sucked at his fingers until they were clean.
Daniel's cock inside him was still hard. He kissed his way up to Sam's sweaty hair. "You belong to me, Sam." Daniel whispered. "Bring him to me."
Sam nodded. "I will Daniel." He turned, Daniel's cock slipping out of him, and kissed Daniel deeply. Power thrummed through him. He could see Daniel, not the human form he wore, but the demon underneath. He was radiant.
"I love you Sam."
"And I love you, Daniel."
"Go get cleaned up. Call your brother. He should be nearly ready."
They were nearly through their meal when John saw the first signs of the drug affecting Dean. His words slurred a little and he shook his head like he was dizzy.
"You okay, Son?"
Dean frowned. "I don't know. Feels weird."
John forced a laugh. "Don't tell me you're drunk. You haven't even finished your second beer."
"No…just…fuzzy." Dean blinked and looked up at him. "What was I saying?"
"Something about how you think I'd really like it here?" John said, finishing off his second beer.
"Yeah, there's a lot you'd like." Dean said, squinting at him. "You could stay with Sam."
It was John's turn to blink, an odd desire building inside him to agree with Dean. Maybe it was time to move things along. "You know, you don't look so good."
Dean was starting to sweat and he tugged at his collar. "Yeah…not feeling great either."
"Why don't you let me drive you back?"
Dean nodded and John pulled out his wallet, dropping enough money to cover the bill and sliding out of the booth. Dean followed, grabbing at his arm as they neared the door. "Woah."
John slipped an arm around him to hold him up and took him to the truck, helping him inside. He checked the street as he got in, turning the engine before he was fully in the seat. "Just hold on Dean, it's going to be okay."
"What…" Dean was shaking his head, holding the dashboard. "Did you d'ug me?" His words slurred and he was starting to look a little green.
"It's for your own good, Dean." John pulled onto the freeway and headed for the Bay Bridge. He had to get Dean out to Oakland before he figured out how to get Sam too. Dean's head lolled against the seat, his eyes closing as the drug dragged him under.
John found the deserted looking warehouse building easily enough, and Joshua opened the overhead door to let him pull in next to the ambulance that they would use to get the hell out of California once he had both boys.. "He's out."
Joshua nodded as he opened Dean's door. "Good, that should make him easier to lock down."
"Don't bet on it." John pulled his gun out from under the truck and came around to help Joshua with Dean. "We need to get him settled before I call Sam."
"You sure you want to do this? Both of them at once?"
"What choice do I have?" John asked. They got Dean into an empty room that they had already boarded up and onto one of the gurneys. Joshua was putting the medical restraints on Dean's hand when Dean's pocket started ringing. John fished out the phone. "It's Sam. If Dean doesn't answer…"
"He'll call back. Focus." Joshua said.
John nodded and worked at getting Dean's boots off. "You going to tell me how it is you just know where to find an ambulance no one's using?"
Joshua just grinned and threw him the restraints for Dean's ankles. John put Dean's phone in his pocket and strapped Dean down. "He should be down for a few hours."
"Long enough for us to handle Sam and hit the road." Joshua agreed. "We can get an IV into both of them before we hit the road, keep them under." He double checked the restraints and turned to John. "Bobby called. He said you're an idjit and he's about an hour out."
"You hear from Caleb?"
Joshua nodded. "He's setting up. Should be ready when we get there."
The phone rang again, buzzing against his thigh. He nodded to Joshua and pulled the phone out, exhaling before he opened it.
"Dean?"
"Sam." John stepped out of the room.
"Dad. Where are you? Is Dean with you?"
"Yes, Sam. I have Dean with me. He wasn't feeling well."
"Tell me where you are."
John was supposed to give him the address they'd picked, a motel a little ways away. That was where they were going to get the drop on him. Instead, he opened his mouth and gave Sam the address of the warehouse.
"I'm on my way."
Sam hung up and John cursed, throwing the phone.
"What was that?" Joshua asked.
"I don't know. I couldn't stop myself."
"Are you sure Dean's the only one that got drugged tonight?"
John shook his head. "It was Sam. Something in his voice." Fucking magic. He was going to find the man who did this to them and tear him limb from limb.
Power flowed through him at a frightening level. It had never been this strong before. His blood pulsed with it. He had hardly had to push to get his father to tell him where he'd taken Dean. Of course, Dean had warmed him up. Dean had spent their time alone together gently nudging, and the light drugs Ethan had laced his beer with had helped, but still…he felt like he could take on anyone.
All he had to do was manipulate his father into orgasm, and Sam would have him. He was across the bridge and flying down 880 when a niggling thought that something was wrong started to bug him.
He couldn't place it though and he pushed it aside. This was something his father needed. He'd spent so many years so pent up after the death of their mother. He deserved to be free, just as much as Dean did.
It wouldn't be easy. His father was suspicious by nature, way more than Dean. That was why Daniel had juiced him up this much. He would hold on to the things he thought he knew, the things he believed were right or wrong.
Sam just had to get through to him though. Had to make him see how much better it could be, how beautiful it was to let go.
His father wasn't alone. He knew that before he turned off the engine. He could sense Dean, unconscious…and someone else, someone he didn't know as well. Vaguely familiar. He climbed out of the car outside the warehouse and approached cautiously.
His father opened the door. "Hey, Sam."
"Dad, where's Dean?"
"He's laying down. Inside." John said, watching Sam carefully. Sam reached out for him, but instead of finding his father an open mess of old wounds and sexual needs, he found only a small bit of confusion.
"What did you do to him?" Dean hadn't held up his end. Something had to have distracted him.
"I didn't do anything to him. We had dinner. He wasn't feeling well."
"So you brought him here?" Sam took a step closer and John backed up a step. "Did you drug him? Really?" He shook his head. "You know we only want to help you, Dad. We want you to know what it feels like to be free."
"I do." John said calmly.
Sam felt someone approaching and turned, just in time to take a two by four to the side of his head, knocking him to the ground.
"Shit, Bobby." John said, racing forward.
"He'll be fine." Bobby's voice sounded strange. Sam blinked up as his father knelt beside him. "I'll get the gurney."
Sam felt warm wetness on his neck and his hand fluttered to it, coming away bloody. He tried to get up, tried to move, but his father was shushing him and telling him everything was going to be okay now. He tried, he pushed at his father's head, but all he got was static, and the sensation of something cold pushing into him, pushing against the fire in his blood and lulling him to sleep.
The drive out of California seemed to take forever. John and Joshua rode in the ambulance, dressed like EMTs. Bobby followed in the Impala. Joshua would come back for the truck once they were settled. There were a few tense minutes as they reached the border, but Joshua's paperwork got them waved through and once in Nevada, they just had to drive.
Bobby had researched what he could, called in some markers from experts who knew this kind of situation, cults that increase their hold through magic and sex. Caleb had an isolated spot in the middle of nowhere for the deprogramming, a place long held sacred, first to Native people, then owned by an old hunter who had further fortified it against demonic activity. He had laid in food and supplies and was just putting up the finishing touches on a serious set of wards when Joshua turned them onto the property.
John was in the back, making sure the boys stayed down, under deep sedation. He wasn't even sure how they were going to go about this, only that he had to get them away from the bastard that had bewitched them if he was going to get them back.
The door opened and Joshua and Caleb were there to help him get Sam down, then Dean. Sam was already starting to come around as they wheeled the gurney into the building.
"Dad?" Sam pulled at the restraints, his head turning. "Where are we?"
"Someplace safe." John responded. He and Caleb guided Sam's gurney into the room Caleb had prepared. The old barn was well suited for the task, the storage room complete with a concrete floor he couldn't dig his way out of, no windows. Just the cot and nothing else.
"What are you doing?" Sam asked as Caleb started undoing the restraints.
"You may not believe it now, Sam. But we're helping you." John said, working on the restraints holding Sam's hands. He and Caleb helped Sam off the gurney and onto the cot, then Caleb withdrew with the gurney.
"You drugged me?"
John nodded. "It was for your own good Sam. I know you can't see it, but that place was poisoning your mind. I had to get you away."
Sam shook his head. "No, Dad…you don't understand. Daniel…he's going to be upset. I have to go back."
"No, Son. You don't."
Sam grabbed at his arm. "Where's Dean?"
"He's here too. He's safe. I'm going to take care of both of you."
Sam narrowed his eyes, concentrating. "You have to let us go."
John pulled back, shaking his head. It felt almost like the idea was his own, even though he knew better. "No, Sam."
He moved to the door. "I'm going to give you some time for the drugs to wear off. We'll talk again soon." He closed the door and locked the deadbolt, then lowered the locking bar.
"You okay?" Caleb asked, handing him a mug of coffee.
"Okay?" John asked, sipping the coffee. "No. I am not okay."
"Dean's settled in." Bobby said as he joined them. "Joshua's headed back to return the ambulance."
John nodded and crossed to the table in the makeshift kitchen Caleb had set up in one corner of the barn. They had the boys separated, on opposite ends of the barn. "So, tell me what we know."
Bobby set down a file folder and went to pour himself some coffee. "The Temple of Liberation is a legitimate non-profit, at least as far as Uncle Sam's concerned. They lay low, fly under the radar."
"What about this whacko you told me about?" John asked, dragging the file closer.
"Adam Levy. He's in there. I talked to him on my way to meet you."
"And?" John looked up from the picture of a wiry young man with frizzy hair and glasses.
"Well, he's not as whacko as some might think. What he described sounds an awful lot like a ritual used in ancient Syria, with a few modern twists."
"And this ritual does what exactly?" Caleb asked.
"Well, it was in worship of a demon who bestowed great power on his disciples." Bobby responded, pulling a book out of his bag. "It was said that they could command whole villages in an orgy of sex and sacrifice that reportedly fed power back to the demon."
"Great." John rubbed a hand over his face. "So, what do we do next?"
"We have to break the brainwashing that got them into this in the first place." Bobby said. "He had to have used some trick to pull them in. Your boys ain't that stupid." He drank from his coffee and shook his head. "Okay, Sam ain't that stupid that a pretty face was enough to pull him into this sort of shit."
John bit his lip. "No. Sam's reasons are a lot darker than just that pretty girl. And Dean's too for that matter." He didn't want his friends to know what he knew, but he was going to need their help.
"John, if you can't tell us, we can't help you." Caleb said softly.
"I know." He exhaled. "I don't know the details, but for Dean it stems back to something that happened when he was fourteen. Some coach at one of the schools…hurt him." He couldn't look up. "He never told anyone. Just buried it until something happened between him and Sam."
"Are you saying…" Bobby's voice trailed off and John nodded.
"Yeah, Bobby, I am. Some fucking bastard raped my son and he just kept quiet about it."
They were all quiet for a moment before Caleb asked the next obvious question. "And what happened with him and Sam?"
John sighed heavily and dragged his hand through his hair. "Remember old Joe Mendon's death?" Caleb and Bobby both nodded. "We were the only ones close enough to go in and get that hex box out before his family showed up. Apparently Dean picked up some damn idol and passed it to Sam, and they ended up…I don't know, cursed."
"One of those damn African mating idols he was always peddling around?" Bobby asked frowning. "I thought they were all gimmicks."
"Apparently not all." John growled. "They apparently…" He made hand gestures to indicate what they'd done and stood, pushing his chair back. "A few months later, Sam disappeared."
"Okay, I can see how that might put Sam in a vulnerable state of mind." Caleb said. "It gives us a place to start at least." He picked up his phone. "I've got some deprogramming experts waiting to for me to call and give them some basics. They'll let us know how to proceed."
John watched him go, wanting to throw punches or burn something. He'd never been good at sitting around.
"Why don't you go get some sleep?" Bobby offered. "Caleb set up bedrooms in the house. I'll stay with the boys. We can't do anything until they're clean of the drugs anyway."
John nodded, though he didn't think he'd sleep, at least he needed a break. A few minutes to not think of all the ways he'd failed his boys.
Sam paced the room. Three steps over cold concrete floors from the cot to the wall. Three more from the locked door to the back wall. He shook his head. This was not supposed to happen. He didn't see it, he didn't understand it.
He frowned. Daniel was going to be angry. Daniel was going to come looking for them. And when Daniel found them, Sam wasn't sure what he would do.
He had been fully awake for hours now, the lead feeling in his legs gone, the buzz in his head vanished.
There was movement outside the door. Sam could feel them…three of them. Bobby, Caleb and John. He reached for his father, but felt resistance. He frowned harder. His father shouldn't resist. Sam only wanted to help him.
The door opened, but instead of John Winchester, Bobby stood there, a tray of food in his hands. The door closed behind him and Bobby nodded tightly.
"Sam."
"Bobby? Where's my father?"
"He won't be coming in to see you just yet. He sent me with some dinner and his promise that you aren't alone."
"This is insane. Let me talk to him."
Bobby looked at him hard and moved to put the tray on the bed. "You and I both know that ain't gonna happen, Son. Best you just deal with it and eat."
Sam tried to feel him out, but Bobby was a solid wall with nothing to grab onto mentally. "What about Dean? Can I see Dean?"
"Maybe when you're both a little more yourselves, okay?"
"What is that supposed to mean?" Sam snorted as Bobby reached for the door.
Bobby crossed his arms and looked up at Sam. "Do I really need to spell it out for you? You're smarter than that, Sam."
"So this is what…an intervention? Are you going to prove something like this?"
"We're just trying to help Sam."
Bobby left him then, the door closing quickly behind him. Sam crossed to it and tested the knob, not surprised to find it locked again. He pounded on it for a minute, yelling for his father, for Dean.
When his hand hurt, he turned away, leaning into the door. Obviously they thought that by isolating them, they would be able to reason with them…get to them. Turn them against Daniel.
Sam shook his head and went back to pacing. He wouldn't betray Daniel, not after everything Daniel had given him. Daniel loved him and Sam loved Daniel.
Daniel had made everything okay. His love for his brother, his need and desire for Dean, without Daniel, Sam was lost. He would never leave willingly. He had to get back to him. Somehow.
Dean looked up blearily from the corner of the room as the door opened. Caleb stepped into the room, a tray in his hands. Dean squinted at him, not entirely sure he was real.
"Dean?"
Everything was too much, the light, the sound of the door scraping the floor, the way Caleb's voice rose. Dean lowered his head into his knees, covering his head with his hands.
Footsteps echoed on the cold floor and a hand touched his head. "Dean, are you okay?"
Dean lifted his head, blinking up at Caleb. "Where…?"
"Someplace safe." Caleb said, squatting beside him.
"Sam?"
Caleb nodded. "He's here too."
Dean held his head. "I don't feel so good."
"No, I'm betting you don't. Your father had to put you down pretty hard. It's going to take a while to work its way out of you." Caleb pointed at the cot and the tray of food he'd set there. "You should eat."
"I want Sam."
"Sam has his own problems, Dean. We need to get you both better before we let you two see each other." He stood and crossed back to the door. "I'm going to be right out here if you need anything."
Dean watched him go and slowly unfolded himself from the corner. His father. Dean remembered being at dinner with his father, remembered the beer. He'd been supposed to be doing something…but it was all fuzzy. He picked himself up off the floor and went to the door. He didn't understand why it was locked.
He knew this wasn't right. He shouldn't be here…but he wasn't sure where he was supposed to be. He went to the bed and sat on it, lifting the sandwich, sniffing it.
Daniel.
Dean remembered Daniel.
Daniel loved him. Daniel helped him. Daniel gave him Sam. Made everything okay with Sam.
He held on to that.
"No. No. You let me out. You let me out right now." Sam growled from behind the door.
John pressed his back into the door to keep it closed, but he was losing the fight. Sam was insanely strong. Inhumanly strong. Joshua and Caleb held the high powered hose and nodded at him.
John dove out of the way and the door burst open, Sam charging throughw it, just as Caleb turned on the water. Sam fought against the heavy spray, but the water made the floor slick and pushed him back until he was flailing and falling against the wall. John and Bobby ducked around the other two and the hose, moving in while Sam was still struggling.
The wrestled him down, binding his feet and hands so he wouldn't hurt himself, or them.
"Settle down." John said, his voice gruff with tired and worry.
"Or what, you'll shoot me full of your drugs? You think that will keep me away from him? Daniel loves me. Daniel wants me."
"Daniel is using you." John said. "He's a demon Sam."
"I don't care! Let me go." Sam struggled against the restraints. It was time to start weakening him, tearing him down. Making him face what he'd become. They'd already made sure he wasn't possessed, but hadn't ruled out an exorcism as a symbolic way to further pull him away from Daniel's influence.
John held him down while Bobby got Sam's shoes off of him. When his feet were bare, John stood, nodding to Bobby. "I love you, Son."
"You don't love me. You never loved me." Sam spit at him, thrashing around again. "If you loved me you would let me go."
"I can't do that Sam."
John got to the door and turned back. Sam had gone still and was looking up at him. "He'll come for me." Sam said quietly.
"No, Sam. He won't." John shut the door and locked it, leaning his forehead against it.
"That isn't really him." Bobby said softly.
John nodded. "I know."
"He doesn't mean it."
John sighed and turned his back to the door. "I know Bobby." He took the coffee cup Joshua offered with a nod. It had only been twenty-four hours. It was going to get worse before it got better. Sam had gone from trying to talk his way out, to demanding, to throwing himself at the door and they had decided to restrain him to keep him from hurting himself.
"Sam was in for three years, John. That's a long time under that kind of power." Joshua said. "This will take time."
John nodded and sipped at the coffee. "Patience is not one of my better virtues." He set the cup aside and headed for Dean's door. "I'm going to check on Dean."
He listened at Dean's door for a few minutes before opening it. Dean sat on the cot, staring at the floor. He flinched when the door opened, but didn't move. John pulled the door shut and crossed his arms, leaning on the wall. "How you feeling?"
"My head hurts." Dean mumbled, still not looking up.
"I can get you some aspirin."
"Why?" Dean asked after a long silence.
John frowned. "Why, what?"
"Why did you do this?" Dean lifted his head and it was clear he'd been crying. His eyes were rimmed in red. "We were happy."
John shook his head. "I know that you think you were happy, Dean. But in a few days, when your head clears, you're going to know the truth."
"We only wanted you to be happy too. That's why we let you find us." He stood, taking a tentative step toward his father. "We could be so happy together, Dad. If you'd let us show you."
John put out a hand, stopping Dean as he came into reach. "Do you hear what you're saying, Dean? Is that really what you want? The three of us lost inside some demon's sex cult, deluded into thinking we're happy?"
"I'm not deluded. I was happy when Daniel taught me how to love. How to express love."
"What he teaches isn't love." John countered. "It's sex. Nothing more."
"Sex is a physical manifestation of love. It's natural. Beautiful." Dean turned and walked back to the cot. "I could show you."
John swallowed the vague desire to let him, knowing it was a remnant of whatever they'd slipped him and whatever power the demon had given Dean. "No. I'm your father."
Dean shrugged. "Father, brother, sister, mother….they're just words. They don't matter. Love matters, and the expression of that love matters."
"Wow." John shook his head. "You know, you are the last person I expected to ever hear this kind of bullshit out of. Your brother always was a little soft emotionally, took everything so damn personal. But you?"
"Maybe you don't know me as well as you think." Dean spit at him. "Maybe I'm not the good little soldier you always wanted. Maybe inside I'm still a broken little boy that you never bothered to see. Maybe that's why you won't let me help you. You don't want to admit that you were wrong."
"Oh, I was wrong?" John pushed off the wall. "I'm not the one who picked up some damn idol and cursed himself. I'm not the one who got seduced by a goddamn demon."
Dean turned, his face filled with fury. "No, you're the one who left a fourteen year old boy alone and let him get raped, and then never even noticed that I was different. You're the one who left me to raise Sam while you ran off chasing your demons. You're the one who let Mom die in the first place."
The words slammed into him and John took a step back. Just like Sam, this wasn't really Dean, it was a defense, to keep him from having to come out of the programming. John swallowed and turned to the door. "I'll get you that aspirin. You want anything else?"
"I want to go home."
"You are home." John responded.
"I want to see Sam."
"No. Not yet."
"Keep your damn aspirin." Dean turned away and John let himself out, closing the door and locking it.
"Well, that went well." John mused darkly as he rejoined the others.
"Why don't you let us keep an eye on them for now." Bobby offered. "Caleb is back from his run into town. He said something about getting the grill started."
John nodded. "Yeah, I could use some food."
He headed out of the barn and up to the house. He could already smell the charcoal burning. Caleb pulled a beer out of a cooler as he approached, cracking it open before handing it across. "Picked up some steaks while I was out. Figured a good meal would do us all some good."
John took a long drag off the beer and turned to look at the barn. "I'll be surprised if either of the boys eat for a while. They've both hit the angry stage."
"Are you going to be okay with what we have to do, John?" Caleb asked as he laid meat on the grill. "I mean, this will get ugly before it gets any better."
"I know." He looked down at his hand wrapped around the beer. "Honestly, I'm not sure. Dean…he has a point." He had left Dean alone to raise Sam a lot. Even when he'd been there, he'd expected a hell of a lot of the kid. And he hadn't even suspected the rape. He'd suspected something had happened, but nothing like that. "What kind of father was I?"
He looked away, not expecting Caleb to answer.
"No one is saying you win any prizes, John." Caleb said after a few moments of silence. "But as fathers go, you were better than some. Mine for example."
John turned to look at him, but Caleb shrugged it off. He'd never spoken much about his childhood, and all John knew was that he had lived on the streets for a while before a hunter took him in.
"My dad would make this Daniel guy look like a saint, is all I'm saying." He poked at the steaks on the grill, then looked up, wise ass smile in place. "And I turned out just fine. Slightly twisted, but fine."
"I wish I could say the same for my boys." John drank from the beer.
"We will get them through this." Caleb assured him.
"And then what?" John asked, shaking his head. "This is only the beginning."
"One step at a time, my friend. One step at a time."
